I am a servant of Jesus Christ. I am slowly and sometimes painfully becoming the man that God wants me to be. I fight him but he is greater then any argument I can offer or any sin that I commit. He isn't something that I'm trying to be, but is instead the only one who can make me my true self. He is what I search and long for. He is my destination and my journey.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Jesus every where

It's been a while since I've posted here, not like anyone reads this blog, but it's good to get thoughts in words, dare I say therapeutic. I wanted to talk about a movie my dad and I saw a few weeks ago called Gran Torino written, directed and starring Clint Eastwood. Warning, this will spoil the movie for those who haven't seen it.

This movie is about a man who has lived a life of war, racism, and guilt. He is one of the last of the grandfathers as people in my generation know them. Men who served their country, had little time for nonsense and despise any type of change. If they can't work for it, or build then they have no need of it. They are men who have seen death face to face but refuse to show any type of emotion.

Walt, Eastwood's character, lives in the same neighborhood that he raised his children, and where his wife died. Walt is less then happy with the state of his neighborhood. It is no longer a white middle class suburbia, but instead a low income area populated by various minorities, many of whom are members of gangs because the gangs are the only way for them to survive. We first see Walt at his wife's funeral, and we also see his disdain for the lack of respect his grandchildren have for Walt. Afterwords Walt is confronted by the parish priest, Father Janovich who tells him that his wife made the young priest promise that he would look after Walt. He visits Walt frequently, much to Walt's displeasure. Walt has no respect for the young priest who is kind while being a little naive. It's good to see a christian in a movie who is a moron or judgemental, but who lives out his faith while being human and making mistakes.

Walt's neighbor, a young highschooler named Thao, is talked into stealing Walt's prized possession, a 1972 Gran Torino. Walt is caught in the act and to make up for it the boys family, his mother, grandmother, and sister Sue make him work for Walt. Over time the two develop a relationship which becomes a father son relationship, something Walt never had with his two sons, something he regretted all his life.

As the story progresses the gang that had it's hand on Walt's new friend begins causing more trouble. Walt finds one of them and kicks the piss out of him. Thinking the problem is solved Walt returns home. For a while things are calm, until Sue does not come home. She stumbles through the door bloody, bruised, and we learn she was raped. Walt doesn't know what to do, he is used to violence solving problems. Thao expects Walt to exact revenge, and Walt lets him think it. Walt tells Thao to meet him at his house at 4pm the next day. When he arrives walt shows him a medal he earned in the Korean war and places it on the boy's shirt. Walt tells Thao that he has to go up stairs for a moment, instead he locks Thao in because he doesn't want him to get hurt, and he doesn't want Thao to do something he will regret later in his life. The audience is led to believe that Walt will get revenge for Sue and her family. Instead Walt goes to church, makes a confession to Father Janovich, buys a new suit, gets a haircut and a shave, then heads to the headquarters of the gang that raped Sue. He stands on the front lawn and gets the gangs attention. They all look at him as he reaches into his jacket and pulls out his hand in the shape of a gun and points it at all of them, then returns his hand to his jacket and begins to pray "Hail May full of grace", as he is about to remove his hand once again he is shot multiple times. He falls to the ground, landing in the shape of a cross with blood coming from his wounds. We learn that he was not even armed and that the gang was being arrested for shooting an unarmed man. Walt learned that justice in the eyes of men, which more often then not involves vengeance, is nothing compared to God's justice which is nothing but the purest form of love. In this last hours of his life Walt learned that John 15:13 means. Walt died to protect his neighbors from suffering brought about by a gang, even those who would never know Walt would benefit from his sacrifice. Jesus didn't just die for those who would believe in him, but for those who would ignore him, or even hate him. "Greater love has no man then this, that he would lay his life down for a friend", the thing we forget about that passage is that all of us are friends, even those who hurts us the most, because they need a friend more then anything.